Apparently “Don’t Ask – Don’t Tell” Needs Repealing for Heterosexuals in the Military
After all the hysteria over the last several years about homosexuals openly serving in the military and how if “Don’t Ask – Don’t Tell” (DADT) were abolished that suddenly there would be over-sexed gays sexually assaulting heterosexuals from the foxholes to the showers! When in reality, the issues with inappropriate sexual behaviors ranging from over-active libidos to violent sexual assaults and rape stem from the heterosexual population in our Armed Forces. So if they are going to continuously put this debate on the table…let’s look at the realities. Why not propose a very real question about actual situations and events that truly do happen in our military – at all levels – having nothing to do with our brave homosexual military personnel?
Heterosexuals a Distraction in our Military?
When my father was doing a tour in Vietnam from 1971-1973, we lived in Southeast Asia. I was in high school and sufficiently old enough to understand that living in a military environment runs parallel to civilian life in many ways. Some of those ways manifest because there is an over-emphasis of glory placed on high-ranking officers and their wives (and in today’s world husbands). I watched my mother become fascinated with the glitz of being a member of the Officer’s Wives Club, a facility that included a ballroom, an outdoor pool and other facilities that were exclusively reserved for the upper echelons in the military. Granted, having come from Alaska into this environment the appeal was magnified, but not by much.
I witnessed the parties, the flirtations, the affairs, the gossip and the soap opera – all that could easily have been fodder for a Danielle Steele novel. I witnessed my mother and other wives prescribed massive amounts of Valium with an open refill status…after all they were known as “Mother’s Little Helper” and these women ate them like candy. The abuse of this was widespread and the rock group, The Rolling Stones, even wrote about its abuse by American housewives in 1965…
“Mother needs something today to calm her down; And though she’s not really ill, there’s a little yellow pill; She goes running for the shelter of a mother’s little helper; And it helps her on her way, gets her through her busy day”
The balls were glamorous and the women, though dripping in bling (available at 1/10th of the price in Asia than in the U.S.), and ball gowns could not compete with the meritorious bling of most of the men in attendance. The atmosphere was intoxicating and the attendees intoxicated. Flirting found a new level at these events and hands brushed territory meant for one reason only. Far too many accepted the gestures and hushed invitations. Marriages were at minimum derailed and some completely shattered. A handful veered close but successfully resisted.
This is just one picture of opportunities that existed. There are hundreds more including the justification of a tryst while abroad painting it as inescapable according to defenders of the righteous like Pat Robertson who said about Petraeus on the Christian Broadcasting’s 700 Club,
“I mean, who knows? The man’s off in a foreign land, and he’s lonely, and here’s a good-looking lady throwing herself at him. I mean, he’s a man,” Robertson concluded.
These people are really unbelievable…
Pure Soap Opera – Or a Statement About Integrity and Judgement?
Personally, I take this far more seriously than soap. It truly does speak to judgement and character, especially with someone like Petraeus who has put his Dominionist faith on display and supported the “Christian Nation” myth in his personal life and in his capacity as an authority figure in the military.
His achievements have been many, and as I have said before, it is very unfortunate for him and his family that most will only know his name for the dishonor he brought upon them. Those things he did as a “man”.
But where the rubber leaves the road in this case is that incumbent upon Petraeus in both his military career and as a top leader in the world of American intelligence and security carries with it a higher level of honor, integrity and an expectation of exceptional judgement. So, no – General Petraeus, given his tremendously important positions, does not get to enjoy the luxury of a simple human lapse in judgement.
Blinded by lust, he overlooked some very disturbing traits about his mistress, Paula Broadwell, as new information continues to come to light. Her apparent texting harassment of “Officer’s Wives Club” wanna-be named Jill Kelly speaks volumes about the emotional maturity of Broadwell. You see, my expectation is that, lust aside, while Petraeus may not have been able to resist succumbing to his personal wants, is that he should have made certain that these encounters were kept at a substantial distance from his work and personal circles, and even further from his phone, computers, and desk content. He had access to top level national and domestic security information that a select few should ever have access to – including the woman he is actually married to – let alone a mistress.
When a heterosexual woman seeks out the company of gay men, they are commonly referred to as “fag hags”, a slang term that is actually embraced by many who fit this label. Petraeus and yet another General, John Allen, who is also no caught up in this fiasco due to his personal relationship with Jill Kelley – know full well that there are women in the civilian world and in the ranks that I can only refer to as “Brass Hags” and these two fit that label to a “t”.
But to bring this back to my opening point, all this scandalous behavior goes on everyday in both military and civilian lives. No one owns the “moral code” whether a person of faith or non-faith and especially those who claim proprietary rights to defining morality as those who share Petraeus’ beliefs are constantly aiming to shroud the rest of us in biblically-based laws they deem appropriate that would control our behaviors. Ah, the irony…
What Makes Heterosexual Behavior a Reliable Standard of Morality?
I ask this honestly only because the arguments for years from those like Pat Robertson and Bryan Fischer of the American Family Association whose whole career involves his abnormal obsession with homosexuals, bellow relentlessly about the superior moral code of heterosexuals and their fear of the mythical homosexual “agenda”. Really?
Given the huge media attention given to the Petraeus affair and those questionable incidents surrounding it, I believe that someone needs to ask how heterosexual behaviors are somehow superior in moral code? Do they really set extraordinary examples that demonstrate honor, loyal and integrity on a higher level than their homosexual brothers and sisters? Clearly the answer to this is a resounding – absolutely not!
So the next time we hear them spew their hatred of homosexuals while setting themselves aside as superior in character, let’s hammer home the serious, very real, sexual compromises and criminal behaviors by those they claim are uniquely ‘fit to serve’ our country based on sexual orientation.
A final personal observation…
My father escaped the temptations that too many of his buddies fell for. My mother became addicted to Valium and alcohol leading to some very tumultuous years following their return to civilian life. The balls stopped, the glamour receded and a sense of fitting in became challenging after being treated as special and elevated among their neighbors. People like Jill and Paula are attracted to authority and a sense of belonging to a status that they cannot buy. They are status groupies. They are as avoidable as they are a “known quantity”. Good judgement would have averted this entire mess…
I am going to place an appeal at the end of each article here at God’s Own Party? in our effort to raise donation funding that will enable us to keep up our work. In addition to the narrative articles that I write such as this one, my colleague and I have created The Kryptonite Project as well where we expose ReBiblicans hiding under the Republican Party skirts.
Our work has grown exponentially and the costs of making this work available is now beyond my personal grasp. Because we know that our eyes are trained these days to completely miss the “Donate” buttons on side bars, I am also embedding at the bottom of each post. Even $5, $10 a month will support our efforts as we look now to 2014 and 2016.